I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
