There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
