Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize