So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
