I'm gonna have a badass scar
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
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