Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
