bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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