Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
This girl is more easily done than said...
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize
