i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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