Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
