Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
