no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize