"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
