3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
worst night to have a conscience
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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