i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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