wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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