In the future we'll all be gay
What did we do last night that was yellow?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
soo... how was my night?
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