Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
