I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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