I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Randomize
