could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
