i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
