we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
