i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
The power of my boobs compel you
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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