i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Randomize
