I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
We have so much sex to catch up on
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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