I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
