Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
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