You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
