can we get nightvision for the apartment?
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
