That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
