For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize
