They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Randomize
