I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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