are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Randomize
