We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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