I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
