Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I smell like Dick and happiness
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize