Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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