Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
