In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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