I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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