Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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