i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I just want nice things and good sex
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
