o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
