seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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