Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize