Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
