Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Randomize
