i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
