i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
